Thursday, July 28, 2011


Every person running from the man in the business suit has had to deal with dreams. Sometimes they are good. Sometimes they are bad. The Mad Ventriloquist once knew someone who said that the slender man talked to him in his dreams. No matter what is going on, dreams are important. Sometime The Mad Ventriloquist wonders if dreams are his realm. Maybe he truly is a nightmare brought to life. But there is only one way to fight a dream.

Wake up.

The Mad Ventriloquist is not sure how to do that. He has sort of stopped trying to figure it out. The Mad Ventriloquist is not the one who should be doing the action. He is the one who should be getting drunk and giving out advice. Though he's not sure what to do about dreams. Sometimes he dreams, sometimes he doesn't. He dreamed of Minori a week ago. Last night he dreamt of someone else.

There was a sound of crashing glass and The Mad Ventriloquist got up to investigate. He got to the living room when he looked out of the broken window, then heard a man's voice from behind him. "So, this is what's become of you." the man in the shadows said, "The years have really made a difference. For a moment I thought I had the wrong house."

The Mad Ventriloquist looked around in the shadows but couldn't find a face. That didn't matter, he knew who the man was. Mostly because it was a dream. But probably also because he has a very distinct voice. Smooth and low, with a hint of an accent that was mostly forgotten. "How did you find me?" The Mad Ventriloquist said.

The shadow lit a cigarette and stayed silent for a while. Then he talked again. "Minori." he said, "I do check blogs sometimes. Using her real name was risky, you're lucky I found you." The Mad Ventriloquist wasn't sure if he felt lucky. So he said nothing. It was a dream, after all. It's easy to to do nothing and still have things happen.  "You don't mention me, though." he said. He seemed sad. The Mad Ventriloquist wasn't sure if he could actually be sad, but it was pretty convincing. "Did you forget about me?" he asked. The Mad Ventriloquist shook his head. "You're impossible to forget David." he said.

And then The Mad Ventriloquist woke up. Or passed out. He's actually not sure if it is a dream or not. His music CDs are gone. That's a very David thing to do.

The Mad Ventriloquist has to wonder why he hasn't talked about David. Maybe it's because David reminds him of Minori, or the slender man, or maybe because David reminds The Mad Ventriloquist of everything he is drinking to forget.

They were friends once, David and The Mad Ventriloquist. But the slender man came, Minori was gone, and David went with the man in the suit.

The Mad Ventriloquist wonders why David's here if this dream wasn't really a dream. Perhaps he just wanted to say hi.

Or perhaps the slender man has stopped leaving The Mad Ventriloquist alone.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

The Notebook: Donovan

(audio transcript)

Is… is this thing on? H-hello? Is.. is it on? It’s on. Okay.
Uhh… where do you want me to start? Yes, yes I know. The beginning. But…  But… which beginning?
Any beginning? You are very helpful. You are very very very helpful. Okay… Okay… Okay…
Can I have another drink first? This’d be easier with the dr—Really? You’re holding the drink hostage? You are not as much fun now when you’re serious as you normally are. Muh… Okay.
I guess… I guess it all started. Uhh… A year and a half ago.
I’m… I’m a married man. Technically. I mean I haven’t seen her in… in… since… since… since Caleb died. Can I please get a d--- Fine. [pause] I haven’t seen her since Caleb died.
Who’s Caleb? Caleb’s my son. You know this. The recorder, the recorder doesn’t know this. The recorder doesn’t know any--- [sigh, pause]. Caleb is my son. Samantha is my wife.
So Samantha and I got married a long time ago. And, we shouldn’t have. We did it for the wrong reasons and…  [pause].
Caleb started talking about a man with no face.
He was five. He’d just turned five. And he started talking about a man with no face. And… and… it’s fucking stupid. You think it’s just a kid’s story. Just another one of his little imaginary stories and and it’s fucking not. You find that it’s fucking fucking real and it’s going to hunt you down and make you bleed and… just… just…
We didn’t think it was real. And one day… One day… Samantha went out and… so I was watching… watching Caleb and I went outside for a smoke. And he was… [sigh] He was he was being annoying. God, that sounds so awful… It… he was just being a kid. And I let that get on my nerves…
So I went outside for a smoke and… the next thing I hear is this loud crack and I run back in… and Caleb’s on the floor. And his neck is bent all wrong. And there’s a mark under his chin from where he jumped… From where he jumped off one chair and… and aimed so his chin would hit the back of another and his neck just snapped.
My son snapped his own neck to get away from this thing.
[long pause]
And… and I… I still didn’t believe it at the time, ya know? I just thought it was a weird accident or something. Samantha got home and she… she started blaming me. And I guess I deserve it but… I don’t know.
And and… A little bit after I saw it for the first time. I actually saw that goddamn thing outside.
So then I started running. My family, not my wife, my parents  support me. Every… every first of the month… Every first they put money in my bank account. And I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve this… this money.
So that’s why I do what I do. I just travel. I keep running. I keep moving forward. I keep trying to help others so someday… someday maybe my karma evens out.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011


Sometimes, the world feels like a really terrible place. It isn't very nice sometimes. The Mad Ventriloquist wonders if there is something he's missing or it really is desigend to beat people up and take their lunch money. It can be sad sometimes.

But it can be good sometimes. And that is what people really need to focus on. That way, the darkness doesn't seem as deep. So celebration is key. People should always stop to celebrate, especially when there is something to be glad for. But not always just then. Being happy over nothing works. Though it's harder to make a theme party.

The Mad Ventriloquist has a lot to celebrate right now. On one hand, there is a wedding he is invited to. He won't be going of course. He hasn't gone outside in six years. But he has a nifty little webcam set up so he can watch all of it. On the other hand, Don is visiting.

He brought beer.